


Separate Paths

by atenaglory



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Mass Effect 2, Post-Horizon (Mass Effect), Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-06
Updated: 2017-03-06
Packaged: 2018-09-28 16:37:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10138343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/atenaglory/pseuds/atenaglory
Summary: Kaidan and Liara, after they were both rejected by Commander Shepard on the SR-1, build a friendship. After Kaidan's meeting with the resurrected commander on Horizon, he contacts Liara to discuss what happened, and the commander's relationship with Garrus Vakarian.





	

**Author's Note:**

> In my first playthrough of ME1 I didn't talk to the crew a lot, so I was really conflicted when I had to reject both Kaidan AND Liara, because I didn't want to be a cheater, since I knew I'd be romancing Garrus in this playthrough as well. I meant this to be a lighthearted fun thing about Kaidan and Liara becoming friends over their shared rejection, but I don't know what "lighthearted" means, so it's a little sad towards the end. Still, I had fun writing it!

Shepard had deflected when Kaidan asked her about Liara, but, as far as he could tell, it wasn’t in order to hide a budding relationship with the Asari. It had seemed clear that Shepard wasn’t interested in Liara romantically at all, in fact. Yet she had rejected him. Evidently, the conversation had been a total misunderstanding on his part, from start to finish. He’d made all the wrong assumptions. How embarrassing. Or perhaps she was just a good actress, and she really had been interested in Liara?

But it wasn’t long before the rumor mill picked back up, and the information that Liara, too, had been rejected reached Kaidan’s ears. Commander Shepard: hero, spectre, heartbreaker. But, seriously, what was happening? Was she secretly involved with Liara, and Kaidan had simply been misinformed? Did she have someone back on the Citadel or Earth or somewhere? Was she somehow just so focused on Saren that she couldn’t spare any time whatsoever for romance? Was that even possible? She had to at least _think_ about it, right? And Kaidan could have _sworn_ that the Commander had been flirting with him… But apparently, he was wrong. To be honest, if “romantic Shepard” was anything like “battlefield Shepard,” she would probably go up to the target of her courtship and bluntly tell them what time they would be meeting for their date. Less coyness and flirting, more directness and cutting to the chase. So maybe he had let his own infatuation get the better of him, making him think that she had been flirting with him when she was really just being friendly. He was incredibly disappointed, and simply mortified—and his rejection was even more horrible upon realizing that he’d made a move on his boss, who he technically _lived with_.

Naturally, his teammates had their comments. Except Wrex, of course, who was either oblivious or uninterested in the ship’s gossip. Ashley laughed at Kaidan and patted his shoulder _hard_ , saying, “Chin up, Lieutenant! I’m sure you’ll find another young, beautiful, powerful, respectable war hero somewhere to fall in love with!” Tali offered genuine sympathy, but the sentiment was weakened by Vakarian’s snickering and snide remarks about whether all human soldiers made unprompted advances on their superior officers. Eventually Tali told him to shut up and leave, but he was as smug as ever on his way out. Those two had gotten quite close recently, and although they undoubtedly discussed the ship’s gossip with each other, they generally managed to avoid becoming the subject of said gossip. The perks of being an Alien on an Alliance ship, Kaidan guessed. There were some rumors that they were together, simply because any close relationship on a ship like this would face scrutiny, but there was also speculation about himself and Ashley. You simply couldn’t put stock in every rumor, even if _some_ of them were accurate.

In the end, his biggest support came from Dr. T’Soni, herself. It turned out that they could relate to each other the most immediately after being rejected. The commander’s frank-but-well-meaning attitude amplified their humiliation, plus the reactions of their squadmates left them both feeling somewhat alienated. This eventually drew them together, and strengthened the bond between them, which had previously been all but nonexistent.

It started in the mess, quite early in the Normandy’s day cycle, soon after the rejections. Kaidan, who had quickly realized that it would be easier to simply avoid his fellow crew members (including Shepard) until the gossip died down, showed up for breakfast at 0500. Dr. Chakwas and the commander tended to eat early, as well, but they wouldn’t be around for at least another half hour. But when he approached the kitchen, he was surprised to find that he hadn’t been the only one with that idea. He prepared his food, and joined Liara at her table. She froze as he sat down, and stared at him in horror. He pretended not to notice for a moment, digging in to his meal, but the atmosphere quickly became too awkward to bear, and he decided to start a conversation.

“So, uh… You’re up early,” he tried.

Her expression shifted from horror to surprise, before folding into a determined glare.

“Are you here to gloat, Kaidan?” Liara said quietly, voice wavering slightly. “You didn’t strike me as the type. I’m disappointed.”

“Gloat? Gloat about what?” He was starting to think he should have turned around and gone back to bed when he saw her sitting there. He hadn’t encountered a situation this awkward in ages, and never since joining the Normandy. Excluding his recent rejection, of course.

“About the Commander. I assume you’ve heard that she rejected me.”

“I have, but you… _You_ haven’t heard?”

“Heard what?” Her glare relaxed now, the characteristic curiosity returning to her gaze.

“I got rejected, too.” Kaidan couldn’t help but chuckle a little. “That’s why I’m here at the crack of dawn, so to speak. I’m laying low, trying to avoid all the gossip for a while.”

“Oh! Oh, I… I’m sorry. I thought….”

“It’s alright, no need to worry.” Kaidan laughed again, feeling more relaxed now. “We’re in the same boat.”

“So it would seem. I’d assumed that the commander had rejected me because she was interested in you, even though she skirted around the topic when I brought it up.”

“Heh, same here. I only heard the next day that you had gotten rejected, too.”

“I guess I don’t hear much gossip tucked away behind the med bay. And earning the trust of our crewmates has been no small task for me. As both an… _alien_ , and the daughter of one of our enemies, most people are afraid of me. When I enter a room, generally everyone goes quiet. I only realized how publicized my own rejection had become when I noticed the stifled laughter or pitying glances that recently started to accompany the silence.”

“Ah, I… I hadn’t realized. I guess it must be pretty hard for you… Sorry we haven’t been more welcoming, Liara.”

“It’s alright. As long as we’re all cooperating, it’s alright. I’m used to working in solitude, anyway.”

“It’s not alright. We represent the Alliance, and humanity, and we should have been more open. You offered to help us and everyone but Commander Shepard treated you suspiciously. I’m sorry.”

Liara smiled for the first time in their conversation, now. It was a timid smile, but a hopeful one.

“Thank you, Lieutenant,” Liara said quietly.

“But, uh, anyway,” Kaidan said hastily. He was a little embarrassed at suddenly getting so serious in front of someone he didn’t know that well. “So if Shepard wasn’t interested in you, and she rejected me…?”

“Perhaps she is just that dedicated to the mission. You’ve seen how she works….”

“Yeah, Shepard is a force of nature. I guess forces of nature haven’t been historically known for their romantic entanglements.”

Liara laughed. “No, indeed!”

It was a relief for Kaidan to be able to share these thoughts with someone. They spent the rest of breakfast quite amicably discussing whether Shepard had a love interest on or off the Normandy, and quickly found themselves spending time joking about crewmates or missions during their early morning breakfasts. Eventually their conversation topics branched out, Liara learned about human involvement with Element Zero and development of biotics, and Kaidan learned, through Liara’s long-winded but ultimately endearing lectures, about the Protheans and what Saren’s motives might be. Their friendship grew, and Kaidan helped Liara become more acquainted with and accepted by most of the human members of the Normandy’s crew. He also found that, as the only other “aliens” on the ship, Garrus and Tali were much kinder to Liara than the Alliance crewmembers had been, and so through her he got to know them a little better, too. When he learned Garrus’ personality, it briefly occurred to Kaidan that this person, with his charming mix of sarcastic banter and a fundamental desire for justice, might be someone that caught the commander’s eye. But examining their interactions, he couldn’t tell any difference from her normal authoritative-but-friendly attitude, and he could sense little but respect and pure admiration from Garrus. Though they both had that core desire for justice, Shepard clearly favored a fairer approach, while Garrus was more concerned that justice be done, whatever the cost. When they butted heads, Garrus backed off almost immediately. Since he wasn’t Alliance, this was obviously his own personal respect for Shepard at play, rather than him defaulting to rank. But there didn’t seem to be any particular romantic inclination from either of them. In the end, maybe it was only Kaidan and Liara that were too concerned with romance. But he couldn’t help it—as he had once admitted to Shepard, he was a romantic.

But two years later, after the remaining crew of the Normandy SR-1 had all but forgotten about the good old days chasing Saren, Kaidan would sarcastically revisit his thoughts about Garrus and Shepard from that time. He didn’t know how the two of them found each other, but he knew that _he_ had found out that Shepard was alive from rumors and sketchy news reports. And on Horizon, when he tried to confront her for _two years_ , for how much he—how much all of them—had gone through trying to move on after she died, he saw Garrus grow defensive. The other person with them seemed mainly passive, but as Kaidan demanded answers from the commander, Garrus had inched forward, remaining behind Shepard but drawing close to her with a clearly protective stance, and had put his two cents in here and there in the argument, supporting Shepard. This dynamic was different from the SR-1. Garrus had been more passive before. Interesting. From their perspective, it probably seemed like Garrus was loyal and Kaidan was being irrational and unforgiving, but what was he supposed to do? She hadn’t so much as sent him a one-line message, “Hey, I’m alive”, and she was working with _Cerberus_! The whole ordeal had been stressful, and the first person he reported to about it all was Liara T’Soni.

By the time he contacted her, he had calmed down considerably, and had spent quite some time mulling over the situation, picking everything apart. Although Shepard and Garrus were teammates again, there hadn’t been anything overtly flirtatious or suggestive about their interactions. But since Shepard was in an argument and being commander when he’d seen her, perhaps there were parts of the relationship that Kaidan hadn’t seen. Did Garrus’ defensiveness stem from his original admiration and respect of the commander? His attitude had seemed different from the Garrus on the SR-1, who would likely have remained quiet in a situation like that one. And Shepard. She hadn’t tried to stop Garrus from intervening in their conversation. In a way, it seemed like Garrus was saying the things that she didn’t want to. If she said diplomatically that Kaidan had to look at the facts, that Cerberus was working to help humanity when the Alliance wasn’t, Garrus would bluntly add that Kaidan was refusing to see reason. A comment from Shepard that Kaidan was letting his feelings about Cerberus get in the way of reality would garner an addition from Garrus, stating that the smartest thing to do would be to join Shepard now and fight the Collectors. What were they some kind of duo now? Of course, Kaidan realized that he might have just been reading too much into everything. He needed a sounding board, but his go-to person on matters like this would have been Ashley. She would be the first to scrutinize and overthink things with him, or tell him he was being stupid and needed a drink, and she certainly would have been angry on his behalf in this situation. Ashley was as Alliance as they came, and he knew she would be livid to hear that Shepard was working for Cerberus. He missed her. But after a while, he realized that he could try talking to Liara. She had been the closest to him when it came to Shepard and romance, and he was sure that she would hear him out.

About a week passed before he got the chance to contact her, and he was surprised when she answered his call with, “Kaidan. I was just thinking of getting in touch.”

“She sounded colder… quieter… It was almost as concerning as the resurrection of Shepard and her ship. It now occurred to him that Liara, like Garrus, had also changed in the past two years.

“I, uh… I assume you’ve heard about the Commander, then,” Kaidan said uncertainly.

“I have,” she said carefully. Her guard was up, too.

“Well, I hadn’t,” Kaidan said sharply. “Not from any reliable sources, anyway.”

Liara’s eyes widened, then she said gently, “Oh, Kaidan, I’m sorry. I should have told you.”

“No, Liara. _Shepard_ should have told me. She didn’t even send me a simple message.”

“To be fair, she didn’t contact any of us.”

“Then how did I run into her on Horizon with Vakarian?”

“Ah, yes… She did mention that she’d seen you, and that it hadn’t gone smoothly. She just paid me a visit here on Illium, you see. But as for Garrus… It appears that she went to Omega looking to recruit Archangel, and found our old friend.”

“Wait, Omega? Archangel? You don’t mean...?”

“Yes. Garrus Vakarian is Archangel. Or, _was_ Archangel.”

“The crazy revelations just don’t stop. Although vigilante justice in the crime hub of the galaxy does sound like him.”

Liara smiled.

“But, what, you mean they just _happened_ to find each other? A whole galaxy, and they just bump into each other?”

“All of my information points to that being the case, yes. Why do you ask?”

Kaidan furrowed his brow, chewing on the inside of his lip.

“Maybe there really is something between them.”

Liara smiled again, although this time it seemed a bit lonely. “This reminds me of the conversations we used to have. But I… suppose I can see where you’re coming from.”

“Ah, was he with her when she went to see you?”

Liara laughed now, much more good-naturedly than Kaidan would have expected. “To think that after all that time we spent idly gossiping about her interest in him, it had actually been true!”

Kaidan laughed too, now. “You seem so sure. I expected to call you and tell you about all of my observations on Horizon, and to have you tell me that I’m overthinking!”

“To be honest, I expected the same thing. You see, it’s not that they were overtly expressing affection for each other, but just—”

“Subtle ways they interacted, right?”

“Yes!”

“Do you think she really was interested in him the whole time like we thought?”

“Well, we did both prove to be terrible at reading her romantic intentions on the SR-1.”

They both chuckled again. The conversation had become quite casual, now. This felt nice. Kaidan had to admit that he hadn’t felt this relaxed since before the SSV Normandy had been destroyed.

“Liara, I’m sure Shepard asked you to join her Cerberus team….”

“Kaidan, you know she’s not working _for_ Cerberus.”

“You’re defending her, too? She’s working _with_ them. With people _they_ chose for her. What’s the difference?”

Kaidan’s tone was sharper than he had intended, and Liara’s expression quickly became deeply conflicted. He knew that Liara had become an information broker—and quite a proficient one, from what he’d heard—and her expression made him wonder what exactly she knew about Shepard’s unsavory new ties.

“She did ask me to join them,” Liara said gently, evidently reflecting on her meeting with Shepard. “I… admit, I was tempted by her offer. It made me happy that she still wanted to fight with me. But there are things that I must take care of.”

Kaidan let out a sad chuckle. “I feel exactly the same way. I felt betrayed and upset that she joined Cerberus, and that she didn’t even try to contact me. I didn’t want to believe that it was really her. I’d hoped that Cerberus had just made a really good Shepard VI, or some false clone. But when she asked me to come back, I knew it was her. And I wanted to go. I wanted to drop everything and just leave with her. And I envied Garrus. What makes him so special? Where are his obligations? How can he just be with her again like nothing happened?”

Kaidan stopped. He realized that his voice had risen, and saw the pained look on Liara’s face.

“Garrus was able to drop everything and leave with Shepard because he had nothing left, Kaidan.”

“What? Didn’t Archangel work with a team, in a base?”

“A team that got wiped out, shortly before Shepard found him. In fact, according to my sources, Garrus was about to join the rest of his team when Shepard stepped in and saved him.”

Kaidan was silent for a while. Then, laughed softly and somewhat bitterly.

“A real ‘star-crossed lovers- type of deal, huh? Must be fate or something.”

“Indeed… the chance meeting and Shepard’s timing do make it seem like those two were _meant to be_.”

“Well, I guess there’s no use dwelling on any of that now,” Kaidan said dejectedly. Complaining to his old friend had made him feel better, but he’d had to face a lot of things that he’d been avoiding. He was glad that he’s spoken to Liara, but in some ways, the conversation had made him a little more miserable.

“But Kaidan,” Liara said. There was hope gleaming in her large, child-like eyes now. “I meant it when I said that Shepard isn’t working for Cerberus. If you believe that the woman you met was Commander Shepard, you have to believe that she won’t be with them forever. After all, excluding Admiral Hackett and Councilor Anderson, both the Alliance and the Council refused to heed her warnings about the Reapers. When the Reapers _do_ attack, and everyone is forced to acknowledge that the danger did not end with Saren, she’ll leave Cerberus. She’s working with them out of necessity and desperation right now.”

“Do you really believe that, Liara?”

“I believe in Shepard. I know she’ll do what she thinks is best to stop the Reapers, and I trust her judgment more than anyone else.”

Kaidan let that stew for a while. Eventually he would have to talk everything through with Shepard, if he were to trust her again, but Liara had given him hope. In the end, their conversation did end up cheering him up. And, complicated feelings aside, he was glad that amongst the unknown Cerberus personnel, Garrus was a friendly face aboard the Normandy for Shepard. If nothing else, Garrus would continue to remind Shepard what her purpose was, and defend her. Even if it was against Kaidan, himself.

He just had to trust that things would be right again. Some day.


End file.
